pet travel is a nightmare

I swear, I never realized how much I love my little Pumpkin until last night, when I tried to book her a reservation as a carry-on for my flight back to PA.

First of all, can I just say that this new outsourcing customer service to India is NOT a good idea? I mean, no offense to India - we have fantastic engineers that either have come to the US, or work out of our Bangalore offices. However, when it comes to customer service, its probably not best to hire people whose English is not that great. I'm sure when it comes to 99% of reservations, its fine, but when it comes to complicated issues, it becomes a nightmare.

So the flight I was originally on didn't have carry-on room for my baby. I spent 2 hours on the phone with United last night, and then another 1.5 calling other airlines to find a flight that had availability. Apparently, Delta doesn't have the same information on their website as their phone agents do :-S

Finally, this morning, I demanded a supervisor (and had to go through 4 people and repeat my request!!!) before I got the deal settled. Luckily, it only cost $75 for me to change the flight - but this doesn't include the $85 each way ticket for Baby. So my grand total for this already expensive ticket - going home when I don't particularly feel like seeing the parents or traveling with a young puppy - comes out to $788.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

hi, from pumpkin

Arf! Its Pumpkin!

Its been 3 weeks since I've come home to Mommy. So far, its been pretty good, although today in particular sucks. Even though Mommy has been home all weekend, I've been stuck in my crate for most of it. I don't understand really what's going on - Mommy blathers on about "kennel time" and "going potty". I just cry and bark in my crate until I get tired of Mommy ignoring me, and every hour or so, I get let out to pee pee on the paper.

On top of that, I had to have my bath today AND get my nails clipped. But I got my revenge. After she cleaned me and my mat, and went into the shower, I poo'd all over the kitchen and rolled around in it. When she came out, smelling like fruit, she said something like "you suck". I'm not sure what that means, but I'm sure I'll get a treat.

I'm adapting well to my new home. At first I was scared, but then I discovered the Alpha female in me. Mommy thinks that she's going to be the pack leader. Right now, I'll let her think so, but wait until I hit my terrible two's! Oh ho! But I think she's very proud of me, because I've learned to be "Quiet", and to "Sit" before I eat or play. I don't quite understand this "Down" thing she keeps saying - all I know is that she drags the treat away from me and tries to push me down onto my elbows.

Sometimes we get to go out for walks around the building, and sometimes she puts me in a little bag and we go out into The World. I can stick my head out, but I can't go much further. I like The World - there's lots of people for me to kiss. I especially like it when people come over to my house and pet me. One time, a bunch of people came over and brought me treats. It was like a big kiss party! But I got tired after like an hour, and fell asleep.

Oh, I'd better get off the computer before Mommy finds me and gets mad. I already hear the "Ehn ehn!" and "Stop it!" coming on...

my friends make me happy

And nothing makes me happier, especially when I am down or irritated, than reading new entries on my friends' blogs:

Rob: http://rob-style.blogspot.com/
Dustin: http://fakedustin.blogspot.com

I wish they would post more often. So insightful.

countdown to pumpkin

... only 4 days left!

I'm so excited! I've decided that Pumpkin is ridiculously cute. I can't wait :-) We're going to throw her a Puppy Shower. I've got a Baby Registry and everything.

If you want to get something for the little one, check it out. Everything is $20 or less.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/baby/1WYJNFJJZ9C30

Woof!

i can't help it - i'm in love

I look at Pumpkin's picture at least 10 times a day, and I can't get over how cute she is. So teeny! Nathan said that all puppies are cute, but he's wrong - Pumpkin is extra cute. Even cat people say so.

I love the expression on her face, so much like my silly-Dindle's. If they end up getting married, they will have the most confused looking hot dogs ever. And her eyes are gorgeous. But its really the nose that does it for me. That little nose - it kills me! I wonder if she can sense that, all the way across the country, there is someone who is already in love with her.

My anxiety has turned into anticipation, especially now that things are starting to fall into place. I figured out what to do with the house to get her situated, and I found an *awesome* pet sitter to take her out during the day when I'm at work. She lives in the building, loves doxies, and is doing it for $10 a day. Excellent! Even more important than the money, I'm happy that Pumpkin will have someone else around who will love her :-)

Not that I'm worried about this little one getting love. I'm sure she's going to be spoiled rotten. Rob is already searching for an A|X doggie sweater for her...

the baby! the baby!

Ladies and gentlemen, meet Pumpkin... the most adorable baby ever! And she's all mine!

Halloween

Every year, we have a Halloween contest at work. And every year, it seems like the most radical hair-related sacrifices win. But this year - it was over the top. May I present Tim and Stan, our two winners, in their award-winning performance:

blerg. sick. pop tarts.

Pop tarts are gross - especially ones that have been in vending for gawd knows how long. They are especially gross when you didn't sleep well the night before, despite being exhausted enough the three days before to be napping every 3 hours.

No matter how sick you feel, how much you want them, how much you want to believe in the good of mankind, remember: pop tarts are gross.

delaying motherhood

So I thought about it long and hard - and followed Janel's advice to sleep on it and go with what my gut tells me. And what my gut tells me is that, as adorable as Vanessa is, I'm not ready for motherhood.

Its not so much because it will affect my life that I'm making this decision, but I don't know if I can take care of a puppy right now, with everything going on. I want to get my sh*t together, get into a more stable routine, save up some money, and spend time to puppy-proof the house. Do some spring cleaning, you know?

I don't want to go on an emotional bender and end up neglecting my baby or something. Basically, I need more time than a week and a half to prepare - mentally, emotionally, financially. Anything less would be unfair to the baby.

So I've decided to wait until after the New Year to look for a puppy. In the meantime, I've already made a list of all the things I need to line up to prepare for having one. It breaks my heart, given how adorable she is, but I think that she deserves a family that can guarantee more stability than I can right now.

will i be a mommy soon?

No, not like that. Silly - who needs more Serena's in the world! But I've recently decided to get a puppy, and now, things are moving very very fast!

I found a little baby doxie in rescue the other day, and applied for her. Its between me and someone else at this point, and I'll know by next week. In any case, she could be coming as soon as next weekend! OMG! I need to puppy-proof the house, get supplies, buy a playpen, find socialization groups, etc etc.

Am I ready to become a mommy? I'm not 100% sure, but I do know that my heart melted when I first saw her picture. If this one doesn't work out, I'll wait until after the New Year to start looking for another one.

However, as taken aback as I am by the speed of this (you know me, always like to have things planned out, ready and in place), I think its time that I just went with things, no? I think it will be a great way to learn how to be a good parent before actually making a mini-me.

So... I'm just letting fate decide. If I get her, I'm ready. If I don't, I'll wait to look after the New Year, when I'll have saved some more $ and gotten my act together.

Besides, look at that face! Look at those pictures! How can you say no?













Rob Quote of the Day:

Rob: do you have to feed them when they are that small?
Serena: um, yes.
Serena: did you have to eat when you were a baby?

and the spillage begins again

This morning, I got to work with my neat new haircut, nice ironed dress, on time for once. And I spilled coffee not once, but TWICE, before 10am.

I think that's a higher power telling me that its time to go shopping. After all, my best purchases have resulted from coffee-induced emergency runs to BR.

its britney, bitch.

tanpopo!

I've decided that Tanpopo is my new favorite place for ramen. Iroha has good broth, but soggy-ish noodles. Zaru (?) has great noodles with not-so-great broth. Tanpopo has both - as well as a huge variety of combinations AND a bright, cheery atmosphere that reminds me of Taiwan.

Nathan and I half-stumbled upon it in our quest for ramen soup tonight (brrrr... its FREEZING today!). Even though I just dropped like $136 at Ranch99 and swore up and down that I would cook more, I'm still glad that I've discovered this gem. Besides, what a great name :-)

mmm... pork chops

I had a hankering for pork chops today, so I dragged n16 out to Chow with me.

You know how sometimes you have a craving, and you find something that's not quite perfect, but does the job? Chow's pork chops were perfection. Not too dry at all, great smoky flavor - for the bargain price of $13.95 for two! So its really like $7 a meal. (Yeah, my Chinese came out there.)

On a less happy note, my TMJ came back with a vengeance this weekend. Its finally calmed down some, but I had to put in an emergency call to Corey. Luckily, I found out that acupuncture is finally covered by insurance, so I can start going back to see Michelle soon.

apologies to my ex-roommates

I don't know if my neighbor is having really good sex (loudly) or watching a lot of porn (loudly), but apparently she's having a lot of fun (loudly). Tonight's the second time that the screaming and moaning actually woke me up from a dead sleep.

Actually, I'm starting to wonder if she just got a new vibrator or something. I don't hear a peep of a partner.

why i've missed rob

Serena: i check my spam folder every so often, just in case something accidentally gets routed there
Serena: i haave a message for "new and improved megadik penis enlargement"
Rob: i get those all the time
Rob: my penis is so big now i dont know what to do
Serena: ew
Serena: gross
Rob: hehe

that seriously, er, sucks.

Courtesy of Yahoo News:

British dwarf's penis gets stuck to hoover

As Nathan said, "You just can't make that shit up."

my newest obsession...

... is a reality show!

But not one with catty personalities, in your face comments, or wannabe's with no talent. Rather, its So You Think You Can Dance - where not only are the dances/choreographers spectacular, but the contestants actually amazingly talented.

Its coming up on the last week, so soon there will be no more. *Sniffle* I have to admit that I've been all over YouTube trying to find clips of dances that I missed, and even wondering if they'll put out a DVD of previous seasons. It hasn't quite been the same since Pasha, the love of my life, got eliminated, but its still fun.

Its also inspired me to start dancing again - Jazz starts this Saturday! And yes, I'm definitely going to see the tour when it comes around.

freaking awesome!

http://www.sanrio.com/credit_card/

No, I'm not kidding. If it wasn't for the fact that I have enough cards, I'd totally get one.

mommy in the news

Don't worry, I can't read it either. But thought I'd post the original article on my mother in SinoVision from this Monday's edition.

Mommy was pretty, wasn't she? :-)

*~*~*~*

1980年，她怀着心灵的伤痛，只身携带三岁的幼女移民美国。她凭着坚强的意志和厚实的才华，一步一步实现自己的理想。在孤独的路途中，她遇到了一个善良温厚的美国男人。他用自己有力的臂膀，护拥着自己的中国爱人，一同编织美好的未来—

今生最美是晚晴

—访Dan Preston俞少华夫妇

　 采访俞少华，预约了几次，都没有约到她。因为近期移民法不断改革，她作为纽泽西律师楼的移民部主任，自然是忙得不可开交。可是我没有放弃这个采访，直觉告诉我，她和她丈夫，是很值得一访的夫妇。于是，我又一次和她约定访问。

　　我们约在一个黄昏见面，到她的办公室。终于，在洒满夕阳的会客室里，我见到了高大和善的Dan Preston，还有面带幸福笑容的俞少华。他们带着感情，在诉说他们的故事，我带着感动，在倾听他们的故事……

海峡那边有至亲

　　俞少华的老家在浙江黄岩。她的父亲是当年黄埔军校的一员，抗战末期，她父亲奉命调职台湾，成为当年由国民党执政的警察大队副队长。

　　俞少华有两位母亲，一位是父亲在黄岩乡下的原配夫人，一位就是她的亲生母亲。她的生母是一位美术老师，与父亲相识后心有灵犀，结为夫妇。在俞少华还没有出生之前，她的父亲与原配生有一个三代单传的儿子，与她的生母生有一个女儿。

　　俞父调职台湾后，日夜思念在大陆的妻儿，频频发电报回大陆催他们过来团聚，可是俞少华的祖母为了让儿子惦记着大陆的亲情，早日完成任务回大陆和亲人团聚，把俞少华的大妈妈以及俞少华的同胞姐姐留在了黄岩，只让她的生母带着同父异母的哥哥奔赴台湾。

　　俞父到了台湾后公务繁忙，顾不上家事，甚至连临盆的妻子都无法照顾。1947年，在一个战火纷飞的夜晚，俞少华的母亲在医院生下了她。

　　俞少华呱呱坠地了，在她出生的啼哭里，就带有很多的委屈，也伴随着许多孤独，因为父亲和姐姐都不在身边。而且，她至今都没有见过她的姐姐。

　　四十年之后，海峡的另一边传来了消息。俞少华的大妈妈后来因为生活所迫改了嫁，她的同胞姐姐也被送了人，在十五、六岁时嫁给了一个贫穷的农民，之后就没有音讯了。

眷恋诗情与画意

　　因为父亲的身份，俞少华一生下来就过着富裕的生活，她的童年是美好的。但是，人生无常。俞少华少女时代，俞父在政界纷争中陷于落败之境，家道中落，俞少华举家从花园洋房搬到了简陋的政府宿舍。

　　雪上加霜，俞父在此时又染上了肺疾，家中一时陷入了贫困。可是，在善良的母亲培育下，俞少华和妹妹读书勤奋，品学兼优，多愁善感的俞少华更是文静乖巧。

　　与其说文静不如说是沉默，俞少华尽管年少，但是家庭经历让她不爱合群，总是独自站在一旁看同龄人嬉戏。她惟一的寄托，就是古诗词和绘画。在台湾第一女中就读时，俞少华的国文成绩是一流的，常常让老师欣喜。古典文学更是俞少华的最爱，唐诗宋词她可以信口背诵。

　　她喜欢古诗，古诗可以带她一道游历她没有去过的大陆，游历中国文化。俞少华还有极高的绘画天赋，这来自遗传。俞少华的外祖父是宁波知名的画家和书法家，其母亲婚前婚后都一直是美术教师。

　　少女时代的俞少华，就这样和诗情画意为伴，以致于她在别人眼里，除了内秀，还具有诗情画意一般美丽的外表。

历练华美成大业

　　因为俞少华得天独厚的文学功底，加上她很用功苦读，因此她在读大学时每年都考得第一名。1969年，俞少华又以第一名的成绩，毕业于辅仁大学法律系。

　　毕业后，俞少华被法学院院长留任助教，并担任院长秘书一职。在别人看来，这是一份很好的工作。但是这份工作薪水微薄，而俞少华的父亲病重需要钱来医治。为了改变家庭经济状况，俞少华担当起责任，辞掉大学工作去挣钱，先后去过两家公司任职。

　　1972年，俞少华以优异的成绩考入了华美建设公司。华美是当时台湾第一家建造高层建筑的公司，人人都梦想进入那里工作，而俞少华则力排竞争者，赢得了这个机会。俞少华是个懂得珍惜的人，进入美华之后，她积极认真地工作，有一股拼命三郎的精神，公司的董事长非常赏识她。

　　在俞少华28岁那年，她荣升为总管理处副处长。俞少华上头没有处长，因为她年轻，董事长在处长前面加了个“副”字，让她继续历练，但是她享受的是正处的待遇，这在25年前的台湾，不是一件寻常的事，曾经轰动一时，大家都很钦佩这位年轻的“副座”。

　　凭借公司上层的信任，俞少华周旋于十四家公司的总经理及高层之间，工作开展得很好，如鱼得水。由于业务需要，她经常远赴日本、韩国、香港、美国出差，所到之处人人都把她当作贵宾一样，俞少华以事业的成功赢得了别人的敬重。

携幼女闯荡美国

　　俞少华的事业是成功的，但是上天并没有让她的人生完美，也许上天认为，她还应该经历更多的磨难。

　　28岁那年，是俞少华的事业巅峰期，也是她人生不幸的开始。那一年，她结婚了，嫁给了一个她不了解的男人，结婚才两个月，婚姻就触礁了。俞少华是一个自尊的女人，矛盾发生不久，她就怀着孩子离开了原本以为会给她带来幸福的婚姻。

　　1976年，俞父病故，怀有身孕的俞少华悲痛欲绝。有死亡就有新生，同年九月，俞少华的女儿宝贝（小名）降生了。在医院里，俞少华独自一人面对孩子的降临，心里的痛，比阵痛的痛，更加强烈。好在她那善解人意的母亲，一直在陪伴她，让她在巨痛之后略有安慰。

　　俞少华坚强地面对生活，独自抚养幼女，但是心灵的伤痛，还是无法消逝，因为还需要很多的时间。她心灰意冷时，产生了一个强烈的念头：离开台湾这片伤心之地。

　　1980年，俞少华告别了亲朋好友，告别了不舍得她离开的美华上下级的员工，携带三岁的幼女，和母亲一起提着简单的行李，来到了美国洛杉机。

　　1982年，俞少华凭着自己的法律系毕业资历，找到了来美国后的第一份工作，担任一家律师事务所的法律助理，生活渐渐有所安稳。

　　似乎动荡，总是和俞少华不离不弃，刚刚安稳不久，生活又开始发生变故。俞少华在新泽西的妹妹病了，需要母亲照顾，俞少华为了妹妹不得不辞掉工作，和母亲一起来到新泽西州。临离开洛杉机前，俞少华发出了一批求职信，幸运地得到了几个面试的机会。

　　她选择了纽约中国城的一家律师事务所。俞少华依旧是那样勤奋、努力，工作很出色，又一次赢得老板的赏识。但是，她在生活中面临的困难更多了。她每天早出晚归在新泽西和纽约之间，来回要经历三个多小时的汽车、火车颠簸，很劳累。再者没有父亲的女儿又成天见不到母亲，很不快乐。

　　最痛苦的是大雪纷飞的冬天。俞少华艰难地行走在雪地里时，身体是疲惫的，内心是孤独的，还带着对女儿的愧疚。当大雪大雨飘在她的脸上时，她分不清是雨水还是泪水。

　

亲和精干的律师

　　朋友们很佩服俞少华，也很同情俞少华，都希望她结束这种身心疲惫的日子。一天，一个朋友告诉她，应该在新泽西找工作，并拿出了一份中文报纸，说Piscataway有一家美国人开的律师楼在刊登广告。俞少华决定去试试。

　　1987年2月，俞少华带着履历表，毛遂自荐敲开了纽泽西律师楼的大门。当时的律师楼有22位律师、50多名员工。老板鲁彬很有远见，认为新泽西会有越来越多的中国人移民，应该在新泽西聘请中国籍律师。有了中国籍律师为华人服务，华人办理移民就不需要远道跑到纽约去了，在新泽西就可以避免语言障碍。

　　俞少华的履历和老板的远见，让俞少华在新泽西拥有了一份喜欢的工作。这一干就干到了今天，有整整20年了。如今，她已经是纽泽西律师楼的移民部主任。

　　这20年间，移民法变化很大，法律及申请方式也一改再改，工作量很大。律师工作很辛苦，也富有挑战性，还常常伴随挫败。但是多年以来，俞少华认真对待每一个案子，遇到很难的案子时，也很想放弃，但是她没有这样做。她想，客人将自己以及家人的命运放到了自己的手上，把希望放到了自己的手上，不可以轻易让他们失望。就这样，她帮助很多的中国人实现了自己的愿望。

　　作为律师，俞少华是成功的，但是作为母亲，俞少华觉得自己是失败的。

迟来爱情更醇美

　　她的女儿宝贝，在不知不觉中长大了。在她成长的过程中，她面对的母亲，总是日夜埋头工作，没有时间陪她一起玩，她的年龄让她无法理解母亲这样做，全是为了她。她的抚养费读书费，只有母亲一个人承担啊！

　　在13岁到15岁之间，宝贝在她和母亲之间高高筑起了一道墙：她拒绝和母亲交流。幸运的是，宝贝和母亲一样聪慧，一样杰出，她赢得了13次辩论比赛的桂冠，顺利进入常春藤大学——宾州大学。毕业后，宝贝被旧金山一家电脑公司网罗，到那里去工作了。

　　宝贝也早已拆掉和母亲之间的墙，和母亲相亲相爱至今。学会爱别人，一定是被爱自己的人感动了。点醒宝贝的“引路人”，就是她的美国父亲Dan Preston。

　　在宝贝封闭自己的孤独的日子里，是Dan Preston，用语言开导了她，用父爱感动了她。在宝贝心里，Dan Preston是世界上最好的父亲。

　　Dan Preston，就是俞少华现在的丈夫。

　　Dan Preston 的老板是俞少华的客户兼朋友。于是1994年，俞少华认识了待人真诚的富有爱心的 Dan Preston。Dan Preston是美国人，可一直在为一家台湾公司工作，接触了很多的中国人，对中国人很有好感。他是一个精密机械的销售经理，感情很细腻，他感觉到自己和俞少华有很多共同点，都需要关爱。

　　和俞少华更近似的，是Dan Preston也是一位单身父亲，带着一位和宝贝年龄相仿的女儿。共同的不幸让他们走近了，他们都很珍惜这份迟来的爱情，最后走向了结婚的殿堂。

满山秋色作厚礼

　　认识Dan之后的第一个生日，令俞少华至今难忘。那一天，Dan送给了俞少华一份特殊的生日礼物：带她到麻省看红叶。

　　红叶的美丽和壮观，让俞少华忘掉了从前的不幸，在心里许下承诺，要珍惜未来的生活。这一天，她露出了和从前一样美丽的笑容，又开始充满诗情画意。她告诉Dan，中国人在诗词里是这样来形容眼前的景色的，那就是：满山秋色。

　　细心的Dan记住了俞少华的每一句话。旅行回家，他请一位中国书法家写了一幅字“满山秋色”。当他把这幅字送给俞少华时，俞少华被深深感动了。她深知，Dan就是自己等待了很久的缘份。

有爱就会有惊喜

　　在与Dan生活的日子里，俞少华常常有很多的惊喜，那都是丈夫为她制造的。

　　Dan知道妻子是一位喜欢水的人，因为每次看到水，妻子都会很高兴。于是，在俞少华50岁生日时，Dan带上她去纽约北部的旖色佳，一天观赏了15个瀑布。

　　那时正好是2月，冰天雪地的，瀑布都结成了冰帘，非常美丽壮观。而俞少华的内心，却被爱融化了，犹如一潭温泉一般。

　　俞少华爱好绘画，也喜欢欣赏画。Dan非常支持妻子的爱好，不时还弄一些画回来送给妻子。妻子每一个欢喜的笑容，都会给Dan带来快乐。

　　Dan的老家在宾州，他按照中国人“落叶归根”的心态，在宾州买了一套房子，准备等俞少华退休后到那里去住。俞少华给这套房子起了一个中国名字：晚晴居。从这三个字中，就可以想象，他们的晚年，一定会很晴朗，很快乐。

我的心理学硕士

　　在俞少华眼里，Dan是善良的，就是对待小动物，他都会小心翼翼的，很认真。他常常去喂动物，和动物说话，他认为它们是听得懂的。Dan认为，交流可以给人带来快乐，也可以为人消除烦恼。

　　以前，俞少华没有时间去关注小动物，和Dan在一起后，在他的感染下，她开始关注他喜欢的一切，还帮Dan一起养狗。他们的家里有两条狗，是朋友送的礼物，从来不养狗的俞少华，为了丈夫的喜好，精心喂养它们。俞少华说，Dan还是一个半职牧师，常常在业余时间为大家做事情，他乐在其中。

　　Dan尽管做了很多年的精密仪器销售工作，但是爱好却很不沾边，他喜欢做心理咨询工作。俞少华深知丈夫的心，也支持他去圆自己的梦。在妻子的支持下，Dan苦读三年，终于在今年六月获得了心理学硕士学位。

　　在丈夫的毕业典礼上，俞少华比Dan还要快乐，她为自己的丈夫感到自豪。

　　Dan Preston和妻子俞少华对未来的生活有着很多美好的设想。他会在做心理咨询师之余，陪伴妻子画画、写作、旅游。她会在闲暇的时光里陪伴丈夫做他最喜欢的事。他们还有一个共同的愿望，那就是：将来，等他们离开人世之后，要一起埋在教会的玫瑰花下，永远地长久地陪伴在一起，为活着的人们祈祷平安，祈祷幸福。

（本文图片除署名外均为俞少华提供。）

Dan Preston和俞少华相识至今，一直互相支持相亲相爱。

俞少华有着很强的事业心，28岁就当上了台湾华美建设公司的副座，管理四名经理和五十多名员工。图为俞少华在台湾日月潭渡假。

1980年，俞少华携带女儿到美国创业。

20年如一日，俞少华在新泽西律师楼努力工作，如今她是移民部主任。

Dan Preston与俞少华有情人终成眷属。图为他们在婚礼上接受亲朋的祝福。

在妻子的支持下，Dan Preston开始攻读喜爱的心理学，并于今年6月取得了心理学硕士学位。图为俞少华与亲朋一道参加Dan Preston的毕业典礼。

*~*~*~*
Here's a poorly translated version, courtesy of Google Language Tools. Difficult to read, but you get the gist.

In 1980, she was cherishing the mind grief, solitarily carried three year-old young girl to immigrate US. She by reason of the strong will and the thick talent, gradually realizes own ideal. In the lonely journey, she has run into a good good-natured American man. He uses the oneself powerful arm, protects is supporting own Chinese spouse, will weave the glorious future together □

This life is the most beautiful Opportunity

Dan Preston's visit to the couple Shirley

An interview with Yu Shao Hua, booking a few, nobody around her. Because of recent immigration law reform, she was a New Jersey lawyer for the Immigration Department director, naturally, is overburdened. But I did not give up this interview, intuition told me that she and her husband, is worth a visit to the couple. Therefore, I once again and she agreed to visit.

　　We approximately meet in a dusk, to hers office. Finally, in sprinkles the full setting sun in the reception room, I saw big genial Dan Preston, but also has the belt happy smiling face Yu Shaohua. They are bringing the sentiment, was relating their story, I am bringing the move, is listening attentively to their story... ...

Across the side loved ones

　　 Yu Shaohua native place in Zhejiang Hwangyen. Her father was same year Huangpu Military Academy's, the Sino-Japanese War last stage, her father followed orders is transferred to another post Taiwan, became same year the police production brigade deputy team chief which was in power by Kuomintang.

Yu Shaohua has two mother, is the father in Hwangyen countryside first wife madame, is her one's own mother. Her birth mother is a fine arts teacher, is acquainted with one another the back of the body with the father to have cleverness, ties for husbands and wives. Does not have before the birth in Yu Shaohua, her father and the first wife lives the son which has three generation of sole lines of descent, lives with hers birth mother has a daughter.

　　After the Yu father is transferred to another post Taiwan, day and night misses in mainland 妻儿, repeatedly sends the telegram to return to the mainland to urge them to come the reunion, but Yu Shaohua grandmother in order to let the son keep thinking about the mainland dear ones, soon will complete the task to return to the mainland and the family member reunites, has kept Aunt Yu Shaohua as well as the Yu Shaohua full elder sister Hwangyen, will only let her the birth mother bring to rush toward Taiwan with father different mother's elder brother.

　　After Yu Fudao the Taiwan official business has been busy, is too busy to think of the family work, even the company is in labor the wives all are unable to look after. In 1947, the night which fluttered about in flames of war, the Yu Shaohua mother has given birth to her in the hospital.

　　 Shirley already come into the world, she was born in the crying, a lot of it with the wronged, is accompanied by many lonely because his father and sister were not in the side. Furthermore, she has not seen her sister.

　　After 40 years, both sides came on the other side of the news. Shirleythe mother, because the life force changed marry her compatriots are sent to a sister who, in 15 or 16 married to a poor peasants, and then a silence.

Love Poetry and Painting

　　 Because of his father's status, Shirleydown on the life lived a comfortable life, her childhood was beautiful. However, the impermanence of life. Shirleygirls era, Yu's father in the political strife into new territory lost, fortunes, Shirleyaway from the house, with gardens moved to the shabby government quarters.

　　Another, Yu father at this time also became a Likefeiji home 1:00 into poverty. However, in the kind of nurturing mother, and sister Shirleystudy hard, excellent, the sentimental Shirleyis quiet unobtrusive.

　　Not so much quiet as it is silent, Yu Shao Hua, though young, but family experience so she did not like teamwork, always alone on the wings to see peer play. Her only sustenance, is the ancient poetry and painting. Among them the first in Taiwan studying at the Chinese Shirleyresults is a first-class, the teacher often gratifying. Classical literature is the favorite Yu Shao Hua, Tang and Song dynasties letter mouth she can recite.

　　She likes classical ancient one can take her travels she has not been to the mainland, Chinese culture abroad. Shirleyalso highly gifted painting, from genetic. ShirleyNingbo is the maternal grandfather of the famous calligrapher and painter, her mother before and after marriage has been art teachers.

　　 Girls Shirley times, it is so captivated and as partners, which in the eyes of her people, in addition to honors, also has captivated the general attractive appearance.

Experience in China and the United States deeds

　　 Because Shirleyunique literary knowledge, coupled with her very hard studying at university in her annual examination in the first. In 1969, through the first Shirleyachievements and graduated from Fu Jen Catholic University Faculty of Law.

　　After graduation, he was president of the Law School Shirleyoffice assistant, and served as president of a secretary level. In others, this is a very good job. But this job salaries meager, and the father of a seriously ill Shirleyneed money to heal. In order to change the economic situation of families, Shirleyassume responsibility quit university to earn money, the two companies have been served.

　　 In 1972, Shirleyoutstanding achievements China and the United States entered a construction company. China and the United States was Taiwan's first high-rise building construction company, entered the dream of everyone working there, and then Shirleyefforts to eliminate competitors and won this opportunity. Shirleyis aware of the value of a person to enter the United States and China, she positively and seriously to work with the spirit of a workaholic, the company's chairman very appreciated her.

　　In Shirley 28 years old, she was promoted to the post of Chief Deputy Director of Management. Shirleynot credited Commissioner, as her young, the chairman in front of the Commissioner added a "vice" and let her continue to experience, but she is enjoying the treatment, which 25 years ago in Taiwan, is not an unusual thing, the infamous, we all admire the young " Watergate. "

　　 With the top of the trust company, Shirleydealings in 14 companies between the general manager and senior, is developing very well, like a duck to water. Due to business needs, she often went to Japan, Korea, Hong Kong, the United States mission, she went all regarded as a VIP, Shirleyto the success won the respect of others.

Carrying his young daughter to travel to the United States

　　 Shirleyis a great success, but God did not give her the perfect life, perhaps God that she should also experienced more hardships.

　　 28 years old, is the cause Shirleycrested, her life is unfortunate start. That year, she married, married to a man she did not understand, married only two months, marriage on the rocks. Shirleyis a self-esteem of women, contradictions occur soon, she would leave the child with a thought that will give her a happy marriage.

　　 In 1976, Father Yu unwed, pregnant Shirleydistraught. There newborn death in September the same year, Shirleydaughter Baby (nickname) of the Nativity. In the hospital, Shirleyalone in the face of a child who fell, heart pain, the pain of labor pains, more intense. Fortunately, her empathetic mother, has been with her and let her in the throes after a slight consolation.

　　Shirleystrong to face life, raising his young daughter alone, but spiritual pain, or not passed, which also need a lot of time. Her despair, have a strong idea : to leave Taiwan this sad land.

　　 In 1980, Shirleybid farewell to friends and relatives and not willing to say goodbye to her departure from the United States and China on the lower-level employees, carrying three-year-old girl and the mother appears with a simple luggage, came to the United States in Los Angeles.

　　 In 1982, Shirleythrough their own law graduate qualifications, to the United States to find the first job as a law firm's legal assistants, life has gradually stable.

　　It seems turbulent, and always Shirleyfont just stable soon began life changed.Shirleyin New Jersey's sister is sick, the mother needs care, Shirleysister had to quit work, and mothers came together in New Jersey.The former was about to leave Los Angeles, Shirleyissued a number of job application letters, has been fortunate to have a few opportunities for interviews.

　　She chose New York City to a Chinese firm. Shirleystill is so hard, effort, work very well, the boss again won appreciation.However, the life of the difficulties facing increased. She mostly in New Jersey and New York between both going to be more than three hours of cars, trains got very tired. Besides the absence of a father's daughter, a day did not see his mother again, unhappy.

　　Pain is the most snow in winter. Shirleydifficult to walk in the snow, the body is tired, lonely hearts are also with a pair of his daughter's guilt. It was raining heavily when the snow in her face, she is not aware of rain or tears.
　

Pro-and lean lawyers

　　 Friends admire Yu Shao Hua, also sympathize with Yu Shao Hua, want her to end this physical and mental exhaustion of the day. One day, a friend told her, in New Jersey should look for jobs, and to come up with a Chinese newspaper, said Piscataway Americans have opened a law firm in advertising. Shirleydecided to try.

　　In February 1987, with a curriculum vitae Shirley, volunteered knocking at the New Jersey law firm's door. The law firm has 22 lawyers and more than 50 employees. The Final boss is the vision that New Jersey will be more and more Chinese immigrants in New Jersey should employ Chinese lawyers. With Chinese lawyers for the Chinese Service, the Chinese immigration does not need to travel a long way to go to New York, in New Jersey language barriers can be avoided.

　　Shirleythe biographies and the boss of the vision, let Shirleyin New Jersey have a favorite work. The try of today, a full 20 years. Today, she is a lawyer for the New Jersey Department of Immigration Officer.

　　 Of these 20 years, great changes in immigration law, the law and the application methods and over again, the heavy workload. Lawyers working very hard, challenging, often accompanied by setbacks. But over the years, Shirleytake seriously every one case, encountered a very difficult case, want to give up, but she did not do so. She would like to visit, to his and his family's fate into its own hands, and hope into their own hands and not easily let them down. In this way, she helped a lot of the Chinese people to achieve their own aspirations.

　　 As a lawyer, Shirleyis successful, but as a mother, Shirleyfeel is a failure.

Belated love more wonderful

　 　Her baby daughter, unwittingly had grown up. In her growth process, the face of her mother, always immersed in the night, there is no time to accompany her to play her age so she could not understand his mother to do so, all to her. Her study of maintenance costs, only a mother bear ah!

　　 In 13 to 15 years of age among the baby between her and her mother built a high wall : she refused and the mother exchange. Fortunately, the baby and mother intelligence, the same outstanding, she won the debate 13 victories to successfully enter the Ivy universities -- the University of Pennsylvania. After graduation, Darling was a computer company in San Francisco recruit, take this opportunity to work.

　　Darling has already removed and the walls between mothers and mothers to love each other so far. Learn to love others, it must be loved their people moved. Baby awaken the "guidance", the United States is her father Dan Preston.

　　The Baby closed their lonely days, Dan Preston, the language taught her, had a moving with her. Baby in mind, Dan Preston is the world's best father.

　　 Dan Preston, is now Shirley husband.

　　 Dan Preston boss is Shirley clients and friends. So in 1994, Shirleyknow treat sincere caring Dan Preston. Dan Preston is the Americans may have been in Taiwan for a company, contact with a lot of Chinese people, the Chinese people the good impression. He is a precision machinery sales manager, who is very delicate and that he felt himself and Shirleyhave a lot in common and need care.

　　 Shirley and more similar, Dan Preston is a single father, with a similar age and baby daughter. Common unfortunately they approached, they treasure this belated love, and finally moving toward a marriage hall.

The way the colors for gift

　　 Dan awareness after the first birthday, Shirley they were unforgettable. That day, Dan Shirleygift for a special birthday gift : take her to see the Red Massachusetts.

　　The biggest beauty and splendor, so Shirleyforget the past, unfortunately, in my heart he promised to cherish life in the future. On this day, and she appeared before the same beautiful smile again has captivated. She told Dan, the Chinese people in the poetry is to describe the immediate scenery, it is : the way the Autumn.

　　Careful Dan Shirleyremember every word. ravel home, he invited a Chinese calligrapher wrote a word "the mountains and the colors." When he gave the site Shirleyword, Shirleywas deeply moved. 她 She is fully aware that Dan is awaiting his fate for a long time.

Love will be pleasantly surprised

　　 Dan lives in the days to come, Shirleyoften have a lot of surprises, it is for her husband manufactured.

　　 Dan knows his wife is a like water, because the water every time, the wife will be very happy. Therefore, in Shirley50-year-old birthday, Dan brought her to New York north of the fluttering of flag color-kai, a day watching 15 waterfalls.

　　At that time happened to be in February, snow, waterfalls have formed an ice curtain, a very beautiful spectacle. Yu Shao Hua and the heart, love was melted, as if a general Tan hot springs.

　　Shirleylove painting, also liked to watch paintings. Dan is the loving support of his wife, also get some pictures sent back his wife. Every wife of a happy smile, it will bring happiness to Dan.

　　 Dan's home in Pennsylvania, according to the Chinese people he "turned" mentality in Pennsylvania to buy a house, preparations Shirleygo there after retirement living. Shirleyto this house with a Chinese name : Opportunity for Habitat. This word, it is conceivable that in their twilight years, will be very clear, very happy.

My master's psychology

　　 In Shirley eyes, Dan is good, is the treatment of small animals, he would carefully and very seriously. He often fed to animals, and animals, who think they could understand. Dan, the exchange can bring people happiness, people can also eliminate troubles.

　　Previously, Shirley no time to concern for small animals, and Dan together, in his infection, she began to pay attention to everything he likes, but also to help Dan with dogs. Their homes have two dogs, is a gift from friends, never dogs Shirley, to her husband's preferences, carefully feeding them. Yu Shaohua said, Dan is a part-time pastor, often in their spare time to do things for you, in which his music.

　　 Dan spite of the many years of precision equipment sales, but not very loving laced, he likes to do psychological consulting work. Shirleyknow her husband's heart and support him to fulfill their dreams. In support of his wife, Dan studying 2003, and finally in June this year received a master's degree in psychology.

　　In her graduation ceremony, Shirleyeven happier than Dan, her own husband to be proud of.

　　 Dan Preston and his wife Shirleyto life in the future have many wonderful vision. He will do psychological consulting division while accompanying his wife painting, writing, travel. She will be leisure time to accompany her husband to do his favorite thing. They also have a common wish, that is : the future, as they leave this world, to work together and buried in the Church of roses, always to accompany to the long-standing together for a prayer alive the peace and happiness of prayer.

P.S. Best reaction ever to the translation: "wow, now I know how they translate the text on those chopstick wrappers".

week 2: indecision

Warning: I took this week's pictures at night, after a big bowl of ramen soup, so they are slightly terrifying. But I didn't want to forget to take them this week - at the very least, it should keep me from gaining weight.

I always get to this point about this time of the month: two weeks before my period, when bloat overcomes me and I feel like I can't even see my feet. I become frustrated and feel fat; my clothes don't zip well and I just want to gulp down a bottle of Metabolife and call it a day.

Considering that I just made the decision not to aim for a size 4 (eg not dieting) but to trim my fat and be a happy size 6, I'm at a loss. What should I do? To diet or not to diet?

On the one hand, I think my original reasoning is valid: I can't sustain a size 4, even if I get there. I don't want to starve myself or deprive myself of the enjoyments of life, such as good food and alcohol. On the other hand, I have regained a good 8 of the 20 lbs that I lost last year, and at this time of month, even my size 6's feel tight.

*~*~*~*
Week 2 Stats:

• Weight: 129.2
• Body Fat: 27.3%
• Gym: 1 hour body workout on Thurs, Pilates on Sat

Accomplishments:

• Started working out with my new "personal trainer" - my friend JK, who has the amazing ability to drag me to the gym, even when I'm about to fall asleep. I'm happy that I pushed him to push me
• Went to Pilates and got my ass kicked. Yay!

Things to Improve Upon:

• OK, the excessive eating has got to stop (as well as the drinking). Sat night included a Swedish dinner for Rob's graduation that was not only cream-filled, but alcohol-filled. I was so hungover today that I scarfed down Chicken Hash and a Cheddar Cheese biscuit
• If I'm going to do Core, I should do Core, not loosely use Core as a template. That was very not good of me this week.
  

Week 2 Goals:

• Gym 3 times: Tues/Thu with JK and Wiggins, and maybe Monday
• Start Jazz class at CCSF
• Get back on Flex (like to eat too much!) and go to a WW meeting

I think, for now, that I will keep plugging away at the gym and continue eating healthy. Even on maintenance points, I'm still cheating quite a bit. If I set my goal realistically - eg, lower on the size 6 range so that I'm still that size during bloatime, I think I should be ok. So, I guess weight range would be 123-ish when I'm not filled with water, and closer to 128 when I am. Right now, I'm still closer to 128 on a good day.

another reason to stay single

Remind me to NOT hyphenate my name when I get married...

Although I bet that whoever wrote these articles had a field day.

hello kitty enforces the law

Nothing makes police officers stay honest like Hello Kitty:

http://www.cnn.com/2007/WORLD/asiapcf/08/06/thai.hello.kitty.ap/index.html

[Update]: What's even more amusing about this article is that not one, but SIX people have sent this to me today. Hahaha... I guess my HK obsession is well known.

week 1: starting with optimism

Yes, I'm attempting yet again to do the weekly summary of what I did well and didn't do well. It helped a lot last time, so I'm going to use it again as a way to track progress.

So, many changes this week. After feeling overwhelmed for quite some time - regarding my weight and otherwise - I think I've finally gotten myself on an even keel and am ready to tackle my life with grace. I've also set some new goals in regards to my weight and fitness, as I continue to just become more and more self aware.

First and foremost: Not targeting a size 4 anymore. I'll be happy with a size 6, as long as its a healthy, fit 6 and not a flabby, wheeze-climbing-up-the-stairs 6. I'm 31 years old, I don't need to look like I'm 22. I want to aim for something I can comfortably maintain, not be stressed out the rest of my life for just a number. That being said:

Overall Goals:

• Size 6
• Lose 5% body fat. First checkpoint will be to get to 25%
• Weight: Somewhere between 122 and 127 will be good. Weight doesn't matter as much as body fat, since muscle weighs 3 times more than fat
• Get healthy! That means taking my multivitamin and calcium, consuming enough fiber, and drinking lots of water
• Stay relaxed and have fun!

Stats, Week 1:

• Weight: 128.8 lbs
• Body Fat: 27.8%
• Gym: Elliptical on Thurs, 20 mins

Accomplishments:

• Got my life in order! :-)
• Found and committed to a therapy group for authentic relationships. This is going to be good, I think, for helping finally relate to women, as well as learning about commitment
• Went to the gym

Week 2 Goals:

• Get back on Core - going to plan out some menus, eat healthy, go to a meeting
• Gym:
• Sunday: Elliptical
• Tues & Thurs: Weights and some Cardio
• Saturday: Pilates

I'm finally back in my groove, and hoping that this time, I can make it stick.

the new love of my life

Its not just that he's adorable - but man, the way he moves... After watching Pasha do the cha-cha on So You Think You Can Dance, I've been hooked on both him and the show.



Just look at the lines of his body when he dances! Its amazing. Now I remember my passion for Latin dance again... *sigh*.

lunch today

This is what lunch consisted of today for Ingrid, Rob and James:



Yoinks!

and so it ends: "deathly hallows" review

Harry Potter, that is.

I'll admit, I wasn't that stoked about the book before it came out. Books 5 and 6 were somewhat disappointing - in trying to capture the darkness that had come over the magical world while simultaneously reminding readers that Harry was a teenager, J.K. Rowling lost her balance, and - dare I say? - the magic that had made Harry Potter so wonderful, so enchanting.

But I knew that the web would be teeming with discussions, spoilers, etc., especially about the ending, since its been such a hot topic of debate for so long. Even days before, I had to consciously avert my eyes from news headlines to avoid being spoiled. So I dutifully went and got the book on Sat am, if for nothing else than to avoid hiding in a cave until I got around to reading it.

And I LOVED it.

"Deathly Hallows" has recaptured the spirit and pluckiness that made HP one of my obsessively favorite readings of all times. Back is the character development, the magical world drawn in such vibrant lines that you can feel yourself transported into it. Little things that seemed to have been abruptly dropped post-Book 4 are unexpectedly revisited - something that had bothered me to no end.

Harry is no longer one-dimensional, accidental, confused, or - let's face it - just plain annoying; his friendship with Hermione and Ron again feel real down to the core, not forced for the sake of being "best friends". You can feel his longing for Ginny as poignantly as your own first love - no longer do the characters seem like they're hooking up because thats what characters are supposed to do at 16.

At the same time, Rowling has drawn a world of terror that mirrors that of the Third Reich so closely, I felt like I was back in my Nazi German history classes. Voldemort is cleverly depicted - not a caricature like he became in 5 and 6, but a clever puppet master that chooses psychological warfare over egomaniacal might. The action is potent throughout the book - but never once, do you forget that the heart of the book, of the series, is Harry's becoming: becoming an adult, becoming a hero.

Its been a while since I've felt Harry was a hero. In the first 4 books, despite the best efforts, Harry always felt like an accidental hero. I agreed with Death Eaters that said that he was lucky, he had great mentors, he had friends, etc. Daniel Radcliffe's wide-eyed wonderment depiction of Harry certainly didn't help, and Books 5 particularly (as I mentioned) made him look just ridiculous. In fact, it inspired one of the funniest laugh-out-loud fanfics I've ever read by Cassie Claire, "A Lot To Be Upset About"

But in Book 7, we see really what makes Harry a hero: its not his abilities, or his destiny. Rather, its the choices that he makes - choices inspired by love.

Harry is so wonderfully portrayed in this book that I fall in love with him all over again. With rumors of his death in the back of my head, the more alive he became with each page, the more I dreaded losing him. I actually started crying at one point in the book. In fact, Rowling even mirrors my own experience as Harry walks towards the inevitable - looking, feeling, smelling everything around him with greater intensity, knowing that it would be the last time.

I won't reveal the ending, although I'm sure my blog post is hardly the first place avid readers will go for a review. But I will say that the ending, while cliche, is perfect. In the hype that has made Harry Potter a worldwide legend, we forget that this started as a children's series, after all.

I don't disagree with critics who say that J.K.'s prose is often clunky, especially towards the end as she tries to wrap everything up and provide the answers that readers have been craving for a decade. Some of the methods she uses are not ones that I would have chosen - or, at the very least, I would have integrated them a bit more subtly. But as a fan, I lapped it up anyhow, my curiosity finally satiated.

But Rowling does also employ one technique that every Buffy fan will love - a fantastic sense of continuity, bringing back subtle scraps of clues that were casually thrown out there throughout the series, and revealing their significance.

As I've mentioned over and over, I did not like Book 5 at all. And while Book 6 redeemed the series, it did not ressurrect my fervent obsession with Harry. But I realized yesterday that, in my apathy, I missed not just clues, but many of the important developments and changes in the wizarding world depicted in those books. Maybe its just because I haven't read them each 20+ times, like I have the other 4. But "Deathly Hallows" has inspired me to reread the entire series again - with special attention to "Order of the Phoenix" and "Half-Blood Prince" - and that is the greatest compliment that I can give to Rowling.

Hats off, to a phenomenal ending. Harry, I'll miss you.

most awesome (and insidious) thing ever

I finally got my external hard drive today, so I was able to archive some stuff and start shopping for new tunes. And I stumbled across the best thing ever on iTunes...

Greatests hits by year!

I think I just spent a couple of hours cruising down memory lane. Seriously, the folks at Apple are freaking geniuses. I can see tons of people (me included) spending money on music that they'd totally forgotten how much they loved as kids.

Yay iTunes.

johnc made my snoopy poopy!

Stan came by and drew a Snoopy on my whiteboard the other day.

And what did innocent looking JohnC do?!



!!!!!!!

The devil shirt must be getting to him.

fun with office supplies

What?! We were bored...

chinese people are weird

Dood...

http://www.cnn.com/2007/WORLD/asiapcf/07/06/largest.loo.ap/index.html

the bunnypad

Its done! Its done! The house is finally set up and done! I never want to assemble another piece of furniture, unpack another box, or go to Ikea ever again!

After 3+ weeks of misery living with boxes and mess, my apartment is finally a HOME.

I've got a million posts to blog up on, but in the meantime, here are some pics of the BunnyPad.


Nathan hacks up my shower caddy


The kitchen cabinet that we had to build and assemble, for lack of cabinet space.


My favorite thing ever! A kitchen organizer from Container Store, also to make up for lack of cabinet space.


The living room, complete with Grundy in the corner.


The dining area. The table pulls out to twice its size for entertaining.


The fireplace and the rest of the living room.


My little work cubby.

ms. taliaferro visits

Two days before I was scheduled to move, I get a text message from Lori, that says:

"Flying in on Sunday. Oh wait ur moving that day. Itll be nice to see you though."

Yeah.

As it turned out, Lori's impromptu visit from New York was a lot of fun. I hadn't seen her in years, so it was great to catch up, shop, eat, drink, shop and eat. She helpfully delivered me to and from work every day, since I didn't know the bus routes yet, and even did a striptease for my new neighbors everyday.

Finally, the Sunday before she left, we actually DID something and went up to Sonoma.

After stopping at the Sonoma Visitors Center for our I Heart Sonoma stickers, we headed for our first wine tasting and an quite nice picnic at Ledsen.


My sticker matches my dress!


Ledsen - and the first of many boob grabbing pictures

Ledsen just happened to be having a classic Caddy exhibit, so of course, we had to indulge.


A normal picture!


I've always wanted to be like Tawny Kittaen and climb all over the hood of a car. Unfortunately, it was too hot to lay for more than a sec.


Lori looks elegant

After drinking ourselves into a minor stupor, we headed to Gloria Ferrerer for some sparkling wine, and a lovely view.


... which of course we spoil for everyone else there with our shenanigans.


The Diva


Lori bonds with MiniBun for the last time

After a full day, we head back down south, where we join Emi and Philippe for dinner at Moss Beach Distillery.


The final scandalous picture

My mom calls me the next day and asks: "Honey, is it possible for you to take pictures without sticking out your tongue, or flashing anyone?"

Apparently not.

stan comes out of the closet

... or the cabinet at least.

Yes, we have a little too much fun at work.